Thursday, July 04, 2013


"With great flourish and no fear." That's how I envisioned living the rest of my life, a year ago today. These days and nights, I try to steer clear of flourishes — they come adorned with too many potentially fatal pitfalls, and while I like partying, I enjoy breathing a little bit more.

We won't talk about fear right now.

Some nights I sit in silence and marvel at how comfortable it has become, how much of a second skin it is to me. For a guy who used to chatter until everyone was exhausted, I am a sphinx. Old dogs can learn new tricks after all. No matter that they have no one to show them to.

The few people still in my world need an ear to lend, and I've got two big ones to do the trick. I listen these days. A lot. Not patronizing, just trying to be a friend with a small smile, one that relieves the heart that grieves. The Gay Dad emerges once again.

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